Couples toys: the forms, and who each one suits

Wearable

Held in place by straps, so nobody has to hold it. The motor sits against one person and a section of it can be felt by the other.

The straps decide everything. Ours adjust at the waist and both legs independently — a harness that only adjusts at the waist ends up loose and ends up in a drawer.

App-controlled

Control moves to a phone, so the person choosing the settings does not have to be the person holding it.

Two things to check: whether the device keeps working if the phone disconnects, and whether it also works without the app. The ones we stock pair over Bluetooth — not app-to-app across a city.

Strap-on sets

A harness plus a dildo, arriving complete. The harness is adjustable at each point, and the set includes the dildo — check that before ordering, because some harnesses are sold empty.

Shared vibrator

One device, used by both, no straps and no phone. The simplest form and the one most people should start with — there is nothing to fit and nothing to pair.

Which first

Shared vibrator first if you are new to this together. Wearable second, once you know whether you want hands-free. App control last — it is the most to set up and the most to go wrong.